


Ain't No Picnic

by AmnesiaticRoses



Category: One Piece
Genre: Being Lost, But here it is, Gen, Helmeppo-centric, Team Up, no one asked for this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-28
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-12 16:55:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29762724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmnesiaticRoses/pseuds/AmnesiaticRoses
Summary: They were just supposed to head over to the island real quick, just to see what was going on. After all, if pirates were trying to ambush and kill the Straw Hat crew, how could Coby NOT go? And how could Helmeppo let him go alone? It should be a simple enough mission.But nothing can be taken for granted in the New World, and when things go awry, Helmeppo finds himself separated from his captain on an island chain full of pirates who probably won't be too happy to see a Marine if their paths cross.Oh yeah. And one of those pirates is the infamous "Surgeon of Death," Trafalgar Law.Well, THIS should be fun...
Relationships: Coby & Helmeppo (One Piece)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 13





	1. Into the Fire

Bullets whizzing overhead had become appalling boring at some point.

The thought occurred to Helmeppo as he ducked behind a rock, crouching low below the projectiles. Sure, Marine training had been all chores and jogging and Garp’s fists for a while, but once he’d followed Coby out into the real world, it seemed people were always shooting at them.

“Hang on,” an unfamiliar voice said from the other side of the cavern the fools were currently shooting in. The muted tone of the voice told Helmeppo the words weren’t directed to him, but probably to the rest of the gaggle of pirates on that side of the cave.

The shooting died down, and quiet fell over the cavern. In the void came the sounds of fingers reloading weapons and feet splashing in the thin layer of water on the floor. Helmeppo used his thumb to adjust his grip on the kukri that he hadn’t dropped like an idiot. He wished there were dry clothes to change into, but that was nothing more than a fond daydream at the moment.

“Did we get him?” a higher voice asked. They were trying to speak quietly, but the open space carried every word. 

“Shh,” admonished another. The voices fell quiet. In their place were … footsteps. He heard four sets, but his limited haki gave him the idea that it was more like five. Maybe six. Some of them were pretty good, he had to give them that.

Limited space. Firearms. Outnumbered maybe six or more to … well … 

His eyes slid to the left, hidden by his shades. A lanky man hunkered down behind the same rock formation a few feet away steadfastly ignored him. The guy seemed focused on wringing out his sodden hat. No help there. At least he didn’t seem intent on joining in the attack on the other side either. Good enough, he supposed. 

Helmeppo flashed his kukri above the rock, immediately drawing another volley of gunshots. As the clamorous echoes died down, he scuttled left and vaulted over his cover. His wet clothes tugged at his limbs, but not enough to hamper him.

Eight. It turned out to be eight of them, with several of them fairly closely bunched up. Looked like his haki was just as unreliable as his ears, But Helmeppo couldn’t restrain a small smile, taking in the scene.

Perfect. 

With two quick steps, he planted his lead foot and chopped downward, knife biting deep into the crook of the nearest man’s elbow. The blade slid free cleanly as the gun dropped from his target’s hands. But he didn’t even pause. Two more steps and Helmeppo dropped to a knee in the thin puddle covering the entire floor, slashing upward across the midsection of a second attacker. The move could have disemboweled the guy if he aimed a little lower. As it was, he’d given the man something to worry about. 

The next nearest guy had wisely abandoned his unloaded gun and was in the act of trying to pull his sword, but his sodden leather scabbard seemed to be giving him some trouble. Springing forward from his crouch, Helmeppo reversed the knife and slammed the hilt into the man’s temple. The guy abandoned the attempt to pull his weapon in favor of bringing his hands up, trying to protect his head, but not fast enough. The second strike in the same spot sent him to the ground. 

As the guy crumpled, Helmeppo made as though to strike him a third time, but switched the weapon blade-first again with a little twirl of his fingers, cutting just above the falling man’s head. Another of the pirates (a larger guy than the rest) was closing in beyond his falling teammate, but threw on the brakes as he saw the knife coming at his head. Letting the momentum of his swing aid him, Helmeppo stepped forward and brought his other hand up in a left hook that sent the man staggering. 

The rest of the crew were a little more spread out. Helmeppo scanned the room at a glance, searching, searching …

_There._

He darted to the right, toward another of the pirates, one who had his sword out and ready. The guy looked confident, but after all the hell … er, _training_ Helmeppo had been through, it was almost like the pirate was moving in slow motion. He raised his sword in both hands in preparation to chop downward on Helmeppo’s arms or shoulder. Helmeppo just kept charging … only to pivot to the left at the last second, ducking around the guy’s clumsy strike and using the hatchet-like blade of his knife to bite deep into the guy’s thigh before sliding free. A little more dangerous, but not if the crew got it taken care of quickly. 

He swung into a slide, finally snatching up the knife he’d dropped earlier, when he’d initially been dumped into this gods-forsaken cave. Another gun went off, but he hadn’t stopped moving yet, and the shooter might have been smart enough to save the shot or quick enough to reload, but _hadn’t_ been good enough to actually aim the damn thing appropriately. Helmeppo came up running, pelting around to a woman wielding a cutlass. Her aim was better than the guy who’d tried to chop at him earlier, but he caught the blade in the hook of one knife. Gritting his teeth, he shoved the blade around and upward, using the opening to slam his elbow into the lady’s stomach. Then he was dodging around her, heading toward another of the pirates.

_To the left!_

He skidded to a stop as his instincts all went into full warning mode. Pivoting, his crossed knives caught the business end of an oversized cutlass.

“Give it up, Marine,” the equally oversized idiot wielding the sword said -- one Helmeppo had thought he’d already laid out. The side of his face looked red where Helmeppo had punched him a minute ago. The Marine cursed himself briefly. Thinking a guy this huge would be done with a single punch? He wasn't Coby, he had these knives for a _reason_. 

No time to dwell. His opponent didn’t seem terribly skilled, but he was very large and _very_ strong. Helmeppo felt his arms tremble as they fought to oppose the downward pressure of the guy’s sword. But that wasn’t what worried him. 

_Standing still, I’m a sitting duck._

Helmeppo angled the knives, redirecting the pressure along the blade of one of his weapons. The cutlass clanged into the stone floor.

A moment later, one of the kukri stabbed deep into the guy’s left shoulder. The guy dropped his weapon to put pressure on the wound, hissing in pain. 

As the man backed off, Helmeoppo took a few steps back toward the rocks from before, then took stock of the field again. Two unharmed, two injured but possibly able to fight, four who’d already lost the will. He flicked the bloodied weapons to either side, sending crimson droplets across the stone floor. Had that been enough? He didn’t really want to continue with this exercise. The pirates were strong and aggressive, but clearly relied on sheer numbers and a few highly skilled members to win most fights. He'd probably be all right, but he was alone, and definitely not at the top of his game. If it dragged on, this could go either way.

One of the two unharmed pirates took a shaking step back, but the other stepped forward, placing herself directly in Helmeppo’s way. “Get out of here and regroup,” the lady shouted. Most of the rest of the pirates hurried to do just that, some helping their downed teammates. Helmeppo watched the scramble, enjoying the ambiguity that his eye shade gave him. Under pretext of getting the stone again at his back, he positioned himself so the one pirate with a backbone stood between himself and the lone exit from this cavern. Let her have her heroic stand, protecting their retreat from the evil marine.

Letting them go might come back to bite him in the ass later, but he didn’t know how many more groups like this might be prowling around. He’d want to save his strength. Besides, he could just _feel_ Coby’s eyes on him.

Wherever he was.

Shaking off that thought, he turned his attention back to his opponent. “You sure you want to do this?” Helmeppo asked, tapping the back of one of the knives casually against his shoulder. 

She narrowed her eyes and just watched him. 

Well, fair enough. 

Their clash was brief but intense. She fought with two knives as well. Hers were smaller, but they flashed with a darting efficiency that for the first time left him feeling like he was chasing in the fight. This lady actually had some skills, certainly more than the rest of that crew. 

But she was clearly used to being able to end a fight early with those quick reflexes. The strain of the fact that he was keeping up with her started to show pretty quickly, as she tried to drive him back and over into a corner. He could see her gritted teeth, the muscles in her neck straining as every inch of her tensed into the fight. 

Garp would say she needed some training. But she certainly showed promise.

After what felt like a while but in reality only took maybe twenty seconds, she began to slow. And a second later, he knocked one of her knives out of her hand. It skidded over behind the rocks where he’d been hiding earlier.

Immediately she hopped back to put space between herself and him, panting, eyes darting between his hands and the rocks. She knew she couldn’t fend off his attack with just one knife. _So what are you going to do now? Go get it? Or run?_

She made her decision almost immediately. 

Helmeppo didn’t have a particular investment in the fight, so he just watched her sprint for the rocks where her knife -- oh yeah, and the other person -- were. “Uh … hey!” He shouted after her, not really sure which one of them he was warning.

If she thought it was her, she ignored him. Reaching the rocks, she vaulted over and disappeared behind the uneven stones. Helmeppo straightened up, knives at his sides, just watching.

A couple seconds passed. Then a high sound that wasn’t exactly a scream but was certainly in that neighborhood issued from behind the rocks. The woman came leaping back into the open and sprinted for the exit, not sparing a single extra glance for the Marine. Helmeppo watched her go. 

“Figures she recognizes a former Warlord,” he muttered. Then, louder, “I appreciate the help.”

The lanky form unfolded from behind the rocks, his eye-catching clothes making him, to be fair, pretty recognizable. Trafalgar Law was a figure who, until today, Helmeppo had known only through reputation. Like Helmeppo and all the other pirates, his clothes were wet but he managed to look like it didn’t bother him in the least. Helmeppo found himself self-consciously resisting the urge to wring out the ends of his shirt. 

For a long moment, Law stared over at Helmeppo, as though debating whether or not to bother with him -- dark, hard eyes without an inch of pity. But the eyes didn’t bother him so much. It was the _aura_ . He felt it off some of the most powerful marines when things got serious. Almost a physical force that pushed people away, warned them against approaching or staring. _Here is danger. Beware, or die._ Fleet Admiral Sakazuki seemed incapable of turning it off. 

Law’s wasn’t like the Fleet Admiral’s -- the marine’s aura felt appropriately like a volcano, close to erupting, dangerous, barely contained and likely to hurt anyone in range if unleashed. Law’s felt more like a snake -- intensely focused but restrained. No less deadly, for that.

 _You’re a Marine, you can’t just back down against a pirate._ So Helmeppo didn’t cower, but he watched, keeping still and trying not to look like a threat. If that guy decided to act against him … well, he wasn’t Garp. He wasn’t even Coby. He had no illusions -- he’d try his best, but against the “Surgeon of Death” he didn’t fancy his chances. Hell, the islands of the Grand Line were littered with the bones of Marines who faced down pirates they couldn’t handle. But he couldn’t be a wimp about it. Not anymore. Not if he was going to keep up.

After a few seconds, Law looked away from Helmeppo, up toward the lone tunnel that was letting light into the cavern and started walking. 

The smart thing would be to just let him go. Helmeppo knew that. Ever since the weird water vortex had vomited them out on this lump of land, the only thing remotely connecting them was that (before everything had gone all to hell) they had nominally been fighting on the same side. But the bridge that connected them -- Coby and the Straw-Hat kid -- wasn’t here. So they weren’t allies. 

But … they did presumably both want to get back to the same place. So helping each other out wouldn’t hurt, right?

Helmeppo was feeling decidedly the odd man out. He’d lost his hat when they’d gotten washed to this gods-forsaken island, but every pirate here had probably been at that skirmish, and that any one of them could know what he was. And pirates _might_ fight pirates, but the Marines were the enemy of them all. Which meant this could get seriously dangerous for him.

 _Damnit, Coby,_ he thought as he trudged up the tunnel toward the light, _why did we have to get involved?_

The sunlight as he stepped from inside to outside flared too bright for a moment, even with his shades on. Up ahead, Law stopped as Helmeppo stepped into the open air. “If you’re coming after me,” he said, voice brittle and no-nonsense, “you had better be confident in your ability to beat me.”

“I have no intention of fighting you,” Helmeppo said, taking a deep breath and at least enjoying the sense of space around him. The cave had felt uncomfortably enclosed. Across from here, he could see a natural alcove made of vines and branches. Was that where they’d come out? Didn’t matter. “I’m not that stupid. But … well…”

“But?” Law’s apparent impatience turned the word into a knife. Hoo boy. Why did he have to be stuck with this guy of all people?

“It feels like two are going to be better than one,” Helmeppo said in his most reasonable tone. “Besides, the sooner we can get back to our compatriots, the sooner we can leave this … whatever this is.”

Another silence stretched between them. Then Law turned his back on him. “Do what you want.” There was such dismissal in the words that Helmeppo bristled, but what could he do about it? So he followed. 

It wasn’t what he wanted to do, but it certainly beat wandering around alone on a strange island or just sitting around like a lump waiting for attack or rescue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this first part explains exactly nothing! In chapter 2 we rewind and see exactly what led us to this point. Thanks for reading!


	2. Into Hell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why were the pair of Marines even ON this island? Well, it's a funny story ...

This whole thing had started with a piece of accidental intelligence on their way to a routine check-in of several islands. The second island on their tour needed a good eighteen hours for the pose’s needles to reset. It boasted a thriving city whose economy was based around the grapes that grew on the hillsides -- and the high-class wine made from those grapes.

This stop usually made for a pretty relaxing break when they couldn’t get an eternal pose issued for the outward trip. But this time, as a few of the senior officers were strolling around town and taking in the sights, a lovely young woman had caught their attention, gesturing furtively to Coby. As he’d gone over to talk to her, Lieutenant Parcell had leaned over to Helmeppo and whispered conspiratorially, “Poor girl’s about to get her heart broken.”

“Hmm,” Helmeppo said, unwilling to make such a judgment just yet. Not that he didn’t think Coby would beg off if she really _did_ want a date. They’d be leaving soon, and even if she was all right with dinner and done, he wasn’t sure their young captain would be. The boy was _entirely_ too innocent sometimes.

But either way, there had been something in that woman’s face. She didn’t look like some blushing maiden asking a cute guy out. She looked like she was scared of being seen. So Helmeppo and the lieutenant moved a little further down the road and took a seat on a low wall enclosing a little public garden to wait. Parcell stared intently back at the alley where the woman had been -- seemed he was a bit of a romantic, that one -- but Helmeppo kept an eye on the surrounding area.

Something didn’t feel exactly right.

It took ten minutes for Coby to return to the street, turning toward the pair of officers as though on a sixth sense (which, honestly…). He didn’t look worried, but he did look stern as he approached. Helmeppo and Parcell hopped to their feet and threw a salute, which Coby returned. But immediately, he said, “Walk with me. We have something I’d like to look into.”

Neither of them questioned him. They just fell into step.

There was a long explanation, but the short version was, a group of thugs were terrorizing some of the people living on the far side of the island. With most of the city concentrated in one area, and most of the grapes grown in vineyards owned by one large company located right in the outskirts, local law enforcement hadn’t done anything serious about those more lonely areas.

Helmeppo got it. The island didn’t have a broad government, so the only centralized leadership was for the city. And the city law enforcement probably wasn’t really built to try to hunt down folks out in the countryside unless they had to. 

It sucked for the furthest-flung farms, but he got it.

But now, the Marines were here, and this was what they were supposed to do, right? Justice. Justice for everyone. Coby certainly thought so, and his certainty was infectious. So that evening, the three of them and a handful of other volunteers from the crew had ambushed the attackers as they tried to ambush a grape shipment. Wasn’t much of a fight, in all honesty. Their captain could have taken the lot himself. Heck, Helmeppo thought  _ he  _ could have taken them. 

They’d apparently been put off a pirate ship onto this island, and Helmeppo could see why. The guys never. Stopped. Complaining. 

“I told you we were hitting this road too often.”

“What, like we could have guessed a bunch of snot-nosed Marine babies were going to show up?”

“Someone was going to!”

There were ten of them, all told, and they were complaining about  _ everything  _ on the walk back to the city. About the company. About their minor injuries. About the walk itself. But mostly they complained about how this was all everyone else’s fault.

“Look at them! You couldn’t tell they were Marines before you called for the attack?”

“It was dark!”

“Their coats are WHITE! Come ON!”

They were giving Helmeppo a headache. He could see a couple of the others casting irritated glances at the line of pirates as well, but none of them said anything on their little evening stroll. Coby had command. If they needed to be silenced, he’d be the one to give the order.

“We were idiots to go against the captain.”

“Hell no. I’d rather face the Marines than take part in that suicidal revenge fantasy.”

“Come on, we’d have them outnumbered and-”

“You think that matters if we’re facing that Straw Hat crew?”

Coby whirled on them. “What about the Straw Hats?”

Helmeppo recognized that tone -- the restrained eagerness Coby always had when talking about that Straw Hat kid, combined with an edge of worry. But apparently the pirates read more into it than that, because they all clammed up immediately. 

_ Sigh. _

Helmeppo drew one of his kukri, tossing it in a lazy arc into the air. “I think our captain asked you something,” he said, letting a little of that old, haughty edge bleed into the words. “Since he’s the one making the report on your arrest, it might be wise for you to get on his good side.”

The chattiest one followed the arc of the knife up and down with his eyes. Once. Twice. And the third time, Helmeppo suddenly pointed it toward the line of pirates, which collectively flinched.

“Speak up.”

And they had. Their crew had been hired to help in a massive ambush, set up by kidnapping one of the Straw Hat crew’s friends. Apparently they were seeking to use sheer numbers to stop them. Helmeppo almost felt bad for the fools. The Marines could have told them that against a truly serious pirate crew, numbers weren’t an advantage. They just sapped morale, as the mooks got taken out in waves instead of one at a time. 

The attack would be in a couple days, on a little mass of vegetation barely enough to be called an island chain. And it just so happened to be near the next island on their own journey. A place they’d be stuck three days anyway. 

It sounded suspicious as all hell to Helmeppo. But as the pirates explained this, he had snuck a couple glances at Coby. And he knew, gods all damnit, he  _ knew  _ that look.So once the pirates had been turned over to the authorities and the Marines were back on their ship, Helmeppo had brought tea to his captain and asked about it.

“You’re going, aren’t you?” 

Coby tried to give him a “what are you talking about?” look, but the kid had _no_ poker face. Helmeppo managed not to laugh at the attempt, but only just. 

But however poor he was at lying to people, he was good at _reading_ people -- unsettlingly so these days. And so it wasn’t a surprise when, almost immediately, Coby realized he’d failed the bluff, sighed and looked toward one of the portholes. “Garp would say the Marines need to know what these pirates are up to, right?”

“Garp has the benefit of being a vice admiral, and old. He has a lot more latitude to just go do what he wants,” Helmeppo said, but he wasn’t trying too hard. Coby’s friend was being set up. Coby wanted to go. No, he _had_ to. Their discussion was really only a formality. 

“Yeah. But if there’s a chance to stop this whole thing from happening, it’s the right thing to do.”

“Sure. But doesn’t this all feel a little convenient to you? Maybe they’re not ambushing that Straw Hat kid. Maybe they’re setting _you_ up.”

“Then I’ll just have to be careful.”

He could be so infuriating. Sometimes, Helmeppo wondered how the terrified kid he’d initially met had turned into this humble example of Marine justice. The guy who always wanted to do right, even when it was hard. Maybe _especially_ when it was hard. Right now, Helmeppo wanted nothing more than for them to just stay safe on the ship and get on with their mission instead of putting themselves almost certainly on the more dangerous side of some grudge match. 

But what the heck. At this point, Helmeppo reflected, he’d probably end up following Coby into hell itself.

“I’ll give the crew shore leave while we’re waiting on the pose to reset,” Coby was saying. “And then just go check it out.”

“Oh? Are you sure we want to do this on our own?”

Coby raised an eyebrow. “You don’t have to come.”

He said that. He believed it. But he didn’t understand -- not really. You’d think after all this time that he might have clued in. But no matter how well he got people generally, he _didn’t_ seem to get -- ever -- the impact he had on the people around him. 

_ If it weren’t for you, I’d either be worthless or dead. And you can sometimes be far too kind. So of course I’m going. Because you may be able to take care of yourself, but everyone needs someone to watch their back.  _

All of which came out of Helmeppo’s mouth as, “It’d be boring to wait here.”

So they’d given the crew shore leave at a nearby island and the pair of them hired a small bubble carriage on the back of a huge, sleek dog-like sea king directed by a kid who didn’t look more than ten years old. Helmeppo wasn’t super sure about the conveyance but Coby seemed excited about it. So they went. At least they probably didn’t have to worry about the kid being a spy. 

The island in question -- “The Hungry Island” -- couldn’t even really be called an island. Their pint-sized tour guide only knew a little bit about it since almost no one wanted anything to do with it, but as he explained what he did know, Helmeppo found himself dubbing the thing “Sabaody’s little brother.” It grew from a massive raft of lily pads, their stems spiraling down into the darkness. They grew in clusters, but all grew in the same general area, forming a main raft and a bunch of offshoots. Some of the pads measured almost half a mile across -- truly monsters of their kind. As debris had washed up on their surfaces, an island chain of sorts had grown up -- mostly made up of other large plants, their interlocking roots and the rotten remains of their dead brethren making up the “ground.” Helmeppo tuned out after a while.

There were more interesting things to pay attention to. For instance, the water around the Hungry Island positively teemed with aquatic life of the large and toothy variety. That, he assumed, explained the name. 

The kid let them off in a small natural bay, shaded by what he first thought were trees, but realized quickly were just massive leaves on long stems. Their semi-transluscent and overlapping canopies made a patchwork of variegated green light out of the sun’s glow. Grinning and waving, the kid hollered, “don’t get eaten!” by way of farewell.

“So what’s the plan?” Helmeppo asked as they waved goodbye to the kid -- he said he’d return at the same time the next day to pick them up. Which meant a night roughing it out here. Juuuust great.

“We try to find Luffy and warn him,” Coby said.

“And if we’re too late?”

“We won’t be.” But he knew the answer Coby wasn’t saying.  _ If so, then we fight. _

Well, that was fine by Helmeppo. He wasn’t all that eager to clash weapons without reason, but this whole thing had him on edge. He could stand to blow off a little steam.

The Hungry Island felt strange. Partly it was the lack of trees. The leaves served somewhat the same purpose, but they weren’t all that tall, only maybe ten to fifteen feet off the ground. And the ground itself didn’t help. The whole mass floated like a raft, and it made the footing unsteady. A man could get seasick just walking on an island like this.

But the worst were the pitfalls -- where a gap in the knotted roots and stems let his foot go all the way down to the lily pad -- and then sometimes right through it, into the black water below. Somehow Coby kept avoiding them, but by the third time Helmeppo’s foot had been momentary bait for all the sea creatures in the area, he’d behind intentionally seeking out the sporadic spots of true land this island offered. 

They’d heard the fight before they saw it -- the ringing of metal on metal, loud voices shouting orders and the occasional sounds of bodies falling. Coby had noticed first, going from his brisk walk to a flat out run and leaving Helmeppo scrambling to keep up. Then they broke through the last few layers of vegetation and the battlefield lay before them.

Coby paused only a moment before rushing in. Helmeppo just kept going, trying to figure out just what he was seeing while trying not to get separated. There were a lot of people -- so many, too many. The area was largely clear of the overhead leaves, letting the sun beat down on the sheer mass of humanity and the bare, debris-free lilypad underfoot. The whole battle field moved in subtle but notable ways up and down. Just great.

And to his left, he could see a large glass container with something swimming inside. First he thought it was some sort of small shark.

Until he saw the swirl of hair around its head as it beat against the walls of its prison with its small hands.

A memory surfaced from a couple years back.  _ “He made them so mad!” Coby’s tone had been scandalized, but there was also admiration, bone deep, in that voice. “They tried to sell his friend, and he punched a celestial dragon! I heard some people saying it was stupid to get in so much trouble for a mermaid, but I think that’s why it had to be done. Can you believe it?” _

Was that the same mermaid? That crew had swung by Fishman Island and made a splash (ha ha) there as well. But if Helmeppo were a betting man, he’d bet on that being the one from the slave auction. 

Well, that explained how they’d set up the ambush. And even why they thought Straw Hat might not immediately suspect. Mermaids were highly sought after by a certain class of scum. Anyone could have taken her and then leaked the information. 

Then the pair reached the edge of the fighting, Helmeppo struggling to keep up with Coby. The guy was fast, was more adept at fighting than Helmeppo despite not using weapons, and was driven by the emotions of the scene, so it was an interesting task. Luckily, most of the people in the fringes were fairly weak and unskilled in combat, just trying to get a look, or pressing intward, toward the main battle. Getting through had been more a question of wading through than fighting half the time. They’d definitely brought WAY too many people to their ambush. 

But in the center, the fighting looked fierce. And it didn’t seem to be just the Straw Hat crew they were fighting. Another crew fought with them, and Helmeppo could see a lanky figure fighting back to back with the man who’d set Coby on his current path.

_ Trafalgar Law? What’s he doing here?!? _

Helmeppo cast around again for Coby, thankful for his friend’s impossible to miss hair. But instead of heading for Luffy he had used his abilities to literally take to the skies. And he was heading left. Toward the glass canister. Toward the mermaid.

_ That empathetic fool. _

Helmeppo had just changed direction to follow when he heard the first voices start.

“Isn’t that that Marine kid from the paper?”

“Marine!” 

A couple people were pointing toward Coby, who remained on a beeline for the mermaid tank, and the growing shouts rippled in his wake. This had gone sour way faster than even Helmeppo’s most dire pessimism would have expected. The movement of the crowd changed -- some people trying to fall back now that this dog of the World Government had apparently arrived, while others apparently thought they stood a chance against Captain Coby.

Of course, with him soaring over the crowd, Helmeppo had no chance to keep up. He hesitated, torn between trying to struggle through in that direction, or trying to help out with the Straw Hats or just falling back.

“Hey, wasn’t this guy with that Marine too?”

That sounded uncomfortably close. Helmeppo turned toward the voice to find a few of the pirates eyeing him speculatively. 

“I think so.”

“Doesn’t look familiar.”

“He’s got to be.”

“Don’t let him escape!”

Some of the people nearest Helmeppo took up the cry and moved back, getting away from him as fast as the crowd allowed. But others closed in. 

Helmeppo cursed his own idiocy. Hadn’t really thought about this part. He'd left his coat behind, and swapped out the normal hat for a nondescript one. He hadn't expected to be recognized, and to be fair, he hadn't been. But now this. For maybe the three hundredth time in his life, he wished he could use geppo. It’d be _really_ useful around now. 

Giving up on following his friend, Helmeppo stopped and brought up his weapons, ready to defend himself. 

But before anyone could make an actual move in this new arena, something  _ changed _ . It was as if the whole island just dropped a good four inches. Water surged over his feet as a collective cry of surprise went up around him.

_ What the hell? The ground’s about to give out. You’ll need to swim.  _ As the ground lurched down again, wetting Helmeppo’s pant legs to the knee, he tried to jam his kukri into their holsters. One made it, his fingers buckling it into place with a practised movement. But the other missed as someone lost their balance and fell into him. He tightened his grip on the weapon, planning to try once more.

Then everything disappeared.

Helmeppo wasn’t sure but he had a guess what would happen. That the lily pad they were fighting on would drop them all into the dark water -- into a void, more or less -- and they’d need to get back out before the sea kings came to the buffet. And for a moment that’s what he got -- hanging in the cold darkness, sensing more than seeing the forms of others around him. his hat floated away and he let it go. But then he felt something tugging at his hair, his clothes. _A monster?_ he thought, before the motion became more insistent. Began to swirl. Spin.

Pull.

_ What the-_ he had time to think, before the motion became so wild, so strong that it obliterated conscious thought and switched everything over to instinct. The water was yanking him in some direction, but he had no idea which way was up. He could be going deeper. Could be going sideways. The movement carried him through the darkness, through the cold water, slamming him into other people, into the stems of the water plants as he passed, tumbling him over and over until he felt ill, but he couldn’t even think about that. He fetched up hard against a branch or something, stomach first, and felt air bleed from his mouth, the bubbles ripped away before he could think of using them to pinpoint the direction of the surface. 

Someone or something slammed into him, knocking him loose and putting him at the mercy of the current once more. Another branch or hand yanked briefly on his hair, then abruptly the water parted and the darkness disappeared in a flare of light -- brief, oh so brief. 

And then he was rolling over and over on solid land, soaked to the skin and washing through a tunnel and into an earthen cave with a mass of other people. He slammed hard against a ridge of rocks, the sudden stop momentarily stunning him. His weapon flew from his fingers, clattering across the stone floor. His shades had nearly come off, caught in his tangled hair, and he slid them back into place on autopilot.

_ Solid ground? Here?  _

But he had no time to think about it. There were footsteps, loud but receding. Voices, sounding as unsettled as he felt, but some of them clearly familiar with one another. 

“Joy, you OK?”

“Fine. Where’s Arden?”

“Shit, he was right beside me. Where…”

“Hey! One of those Marines!”

Fantastic. Forcing his body to move, he vaulted the rocks -- and out of the corner of his eye, he saw someone else do the same. As he landed, his hand moved almost on its own to pull the remaining knife from its sheath. He brought it up, turning…

To find Trafalgar Law five feet away, hand held up, ready to use some power.

Trafalgar Law?

This just kept getting better and better…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometime I really need to do a story where I get to keep Coby around more. Their interplay is a lot of fun to write. :)
> 
> Right now this is looking like about 7 chapters of this nonsense. I'll try to keep finishing one a week.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, here it is, the Helmeppo and Law team-up fic that probably no one wanted but me. Honestly, I'm not even sure -I- wanted it, it just popped up a few months ago demanding to be written so I have slowly obliged. I hope I can keep everyone more or less in character. Wish me luck!


End file.
